The process

The wins, pitfalls and messy in-between

2025 ended on a good note. It was messy, it was beautiful, and it was every shade of progress. I remember ushering myself into the new year in light spirits. I wasn’t hoping for a perfect year—I only prayed it would be easier.

But life had other plans.

February, 2026, I lost my job.
No, it’s not what you think.

I wasn’t let go because I underperformed. Apparently, the company could no longer continue with its existing system of operation due to running costs, and so every member of the team was let go.

I could hear my thoughts in that moment. It was loud. It was uncertain. It was, for lack of a better word, not pacifying. And then as if reading from a how-to-make-it-worse manual, there was no severance pay. My salary didn’t come in that month, either.

Before then, the longest I had gone without a job since age 15 was a month. But this was different. It lasted longer.

I am in a different headspace now. A different place, too, and I am documenting this process. my process.

In the messy in-between, I floated, but most importantly, I moved. What I thought would cripple me, didn’t.

My energy was mostly up. I had promised myself to not get enveloped in the chaos of the messy middle, and I lived up to it.

Rejection emails and interviews rolled in, but the more I reached for stability in them, the more it slipped away. But my spirit was unwavering.

In that season, I was held—softly. I found different passions, fueled some, and set others aside.

I used to pride myself on being in control in most situations, but Q1 slowly took a different turn. The more I tried to be in control, the more I found that I wasn’t.

In the waiting, I was reminded that this too shall pass, but even as it will, there’s only so much control can do.

If this season is yours, too, and if, like me, you are obsessed about control and are hyper-independent, I need you to please know this:

There’s only so much that control can do.

And if anything,

Keep going.